Ministering Sisters

Cover Image:  I am the vine and you are the branches Richard W. Linford (c) LinfordCorporation Copyright (c) Marilynne Todd Linford 2018 All rights reserved

            About eighteen years ago my Relief Society president, Sue Smith, came to me with a proposal. She expressed concern that the younger mothers didn’t have the advantage, as we did, of mother education lessons that were once part of the Relief Society curriculum. She asked if I would write a mother education lesson each month that would be printed on the back of the visiting teaching message to be left in the homes of the sisters. She gave me a list of topics, and I enthusiastically agreed to write the lessons if I could remain anonymous. I felt the teachings would be more effective if no one knew who authored them. The plan worked, and the ward sisters were receptive. But as the lessons emerged, I realized that most of the lessons were not specifically for mothers, because all women inspire children, and the lessons were basically the gospel in action—which, of course, applies to everyone. (With the church-wide restructuring of visiting teaching, my lessons have also become a

Chapter 1: The Ministering Dilemma Chapter 2: Can Everyone Find Happiness ? Chapter 3: It's Fine to Have Problems Chapter 4: Parallel Marriage and Grandeur Peak Chapter 5: Surviving Hard Times Chapter 6: Bad and Good Marriage Advice Chapter 7: What's in a Name? Chapter 9: The Code Word is Lift Chapter 10: Why July? Chapter 11: Who Can Help You Reach your Potential? Chapter 12: Praying with Please and Thank You Chapter 13: My Way or God's Way Chapter 14: Continuing or Beginning a Strong Family Legacy Chapter 15: Miserable or Joyful ? Chapter 16: Getting from Regret to Reconciliation Chapter 17: On Living in Someone Else's Home Chapter 18: RebuildingRelationships Chapter 19: On the Street Where You Live Chapter 20: I Was There and I Was Famous Chapter 21: Dining with Jesus Chapter 22: Feeling Another's Pain Chapter 23: Experiencing Experience s Chapter 24: Feeling Unappreciated and Alone? Chapter 25: In Good and Bad Times Chapter 26: See the Good i

              Like many of you, I have been thinking about  ministering . My Relief Society president assigned me a companion and a few sisters to watch over. I am to  minister  to them according to their needs as guided by the spirit—however, whenever, and wherever. As I tried to put this new assignment into practical application, I thought about the geography that is involved. (If you are thinking, “geography? really?,” stay with me.) All ward leaders from Primary president to bishop are limited in their service by ward boundaries. Stake leaders are the same. The stake president has no jurisdiction outside the borders of his stake. Missionaries receive a call to serve in a specific mission and, as assigned by the mission president, have authority to preach and teach in whatever area within the mission he directs. General church leaders have assigned limits. Members of the quorums of the Seventy receive changing local assignments as they organize stakes weekend after weekend. They

            I don't just believe in " the pursuit of happiness ," I believe in finding happiness and capturing it to make it part of my allotted time on earth. Yet I ask myself, is it realistic to think everyone can find happiness or is it Pollyannaish?             Not all lives have fairytale endings. My friend fell in the night and hit her head. By the time her son found her, she had passed away. Her family will remember the day forever, but even more so her oldest daughter, Sherrie, because it was her birthday. At the funeral, Sherrie explained how at first she was angry that her beloved mother was gone and especially angry because forever after, her birthday would be on an anniversary of her mother's death.             Then she told about a business book she had read on reframing and how if you reframe problems, your outlook can change. Between the dreadful day and the funeral, she did reframe. As she spoke of her mother's good qualities, she explained how she

            Mariah, my sixteen-year-old granddaughter, and I exchanged texts:             Mariah: Grandma, I found a quote I thought you would like. “The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it.”             Me: True.             Mariah: Here’s another one. Wayne Gretzky a famous ice hockey player said: “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”             Me: So true. Thanks for sending these quotes. How are you?             Mariah: Good and u?             Me: Same. And it is good to be good.             Mariah: Yep. And it’s fine to have problems too.            I was more than surprised at Mariah’s response and wondered what leads a sixteen-year-old young woman to such a mature awareness. How could she know it is fine to have problems? Doesn’t everyone try to avoid problems at all costs? Aren’t problems ugly and messy and painful and sad and totally unwanted complications to life?             How has Mariah at such a young age discovered this tr

(This chapter contains good, solid marital advice for emotionally healthy individuals. It is not good advice where physical, verbal, emotional, or sexual abuse is involved. If the abuser is not willing to get help, the advice that follows isn't enough.)             Our back living room window looks at Grandeur Peak , which is east of Salt Lake City, where we have lived for more than forty years. From time to time family members have lamented that Grandeur Peak was not more like Mount Olympus, which is about a mile to the south and grander than Grandeur Peak in every way. Mount Olympus is about eight hundred feet higher, has much more vegetation with thousands of stately pines, and has a noble-looking summit. In comparison, Grandeur Peak is barren, rounded, and plain. However, an imperceptible change has incrementally been occurring, and last fall it became a topic of conversation. For the first time, our family and visitors looked out the window in awe. The formerly desolate landsc

            Pharaoh, king of Egypt, had a dream that Joseph, who had been sold into Egypt by his brothers, interpreted. Joseph explained to Pharaoh: “There come seven years of great plenty throughout all the land of Egypt: And there shall arise after them seven years of famine; and all the plenty shall be forgotten in the land of Egypt; and the famine shall… be very grievous.” (See Genesis 41:25-37 .) Trusting the dream and the interpretation were from God, Pharaoh gave Joseph responsibility to prepare Egypt for the prophesied years of famine. History shows Joseph’s family who lived in Canaan, the twelve tribes of Israel, were saved because they left their home and relocated to Egypt where there was food. It was an 11-day journey of about 250 miles.             Brigham Young counseled the Mormon pioneers, when they were preparing to relocate because of intense persecution, to prepare for the future, frugally and diligently. "My faith does not lead me to think the Lord will provide

            When our oldest children were approaching their teenage years, we were constantly on the lookout for ways to help them grow into responsible adults. One day I found a list of suggestions for success by H. Jackson Brown, Jr. and showed it to Richard. He agreed that the ideas seemed practical and wise and would benefit the family. So we bought the framed poster and hung it in the kitchen. We hoped by osmosis these concepts would seep into our children’s psyche and thereby help them reach their potential and have happy, successful lives.             I especially liked number 21: Don't do anything that wouldn't make your Mom proud. Richard liked all the ones about hard work: “8. Persistence, persistence, persistence.” “10. Be a self-starter.” “19. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did.”             All that was important, but our foremost desire was that our children would have

            The birth of Jesus Christ happened over 2,000 years ago, which is more than enough time for truth to become entwined with tradition.             Truth: There are over fifty scriptural prophecies foretelling the birth of Jesus Christ. Two examples: “A virgin shall conceive and bear a son” ( Isaiah 7: 14 ; 1 Ne. 11:13-20 ); and “Out of Bethlehem shall come forth a ruler in Israel” ( Micah 5: 2 ). (You can read more than 50 other prophesies at: lds.org/scriptures/tg/jesus-christ-prophecies-about?lang=eng .)             Truth: Historical records document that these prophesied events happened and played out in real life to Mary who was espoused to Joseph.             Truth: The prophet Nephi saw Mary in vision and said she was “most beautiful and fair” ( 1 Nephi 11:13, 15 ). The angel Gabriel said Mary was “highly favored” that the Lord was with her (see Luke 1:28 ). Book of Mormon prophets knew her name. (See Mosiah 3:8 and Alma 7:10 ).             Truth: The angel Gabriel tol

            The Church Almanac is a compilation of a boatload of interesting but not necessarily useful information. For example, I never thought about what the most common first name in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is. Have you?             Quoting the 2013, Almanac: “A careful analysis of the top, say, 10 million first names in the Church, revealed a not-too-surprising result among avid first-name watchers. The top first name in the Church is … Maria!             “Maria, the identification word for nearly 400,000 individuals, is the most frequent name by a 200,000-name margin over the next top name in the Church.             “The second top name is the most frequent male name, Jose. About 100,000 names below that is the next most frequent name, David, that is followed more closely by other male names of Juan, Michael, and Luis. Male, because their contemporary frequency on the female side of things, are by now still named Maria.             “Finally we come to

            The video titled Lift begins: “What if your neighbor asked you to take 20 minutes one night to help him? Would you do it? Most decent people would. But what if he asked you every night following, with no end in sight? Would you be willing to do it?”             Richard and I were in the midst of a trying situation. For about eight months, one, two, five, ten family members and friends of family members, four who didn’t speak much English, came to stay with us for a weekend or longer. One family stayed six weeks. We felt like our home had turned into a hotel. It was challenging to keep the common areas tidy, food in the refrigerator and on the table, and the kitchen cleaned up. It was hard to keep rewashing sheets and towels and cleaning between visitors. And the noise level with chatter, laughter, music, and activities was constant.             If it is possible, there was actually too much good music. One of the most frequent visitors was a piano performance major at BYU.

            It's official. Statistics from the Weather Channel confirm that July is the hottest month on average in the United States. July is truly summer. It’s not the winding down from school or the gearing up for school as June and August are.             July has colors—red, white, and blue.             July has history—July 4, 1776—the signing of Declaration of Independence from Great Britain.             July has more history—July 24, 1847—when Brigham Young and the first wave of Mormon pioneers entered the Valley of the Great Salt Lake.             July has fireworks.             July has hot dogs, rootbeer, and ice cream.             July has snow cones in shacks, huts, and stands.             July has parades, camps, picnics, and parties.             July was named for a real person—Julius Caesar because he was born in July. When Caesar was born, however, it wasn’t called July. It was Quintilis, meaning five because it was the fifth month. That’s puzzling because July is

            In business, employers measure employees’ potential for failure or success in hiring, promoting, and firing. In sports, coaches recruit and train players to achieve their potential and win. In education, teachers help students achieve potential to bring honor to their schools.             If a fellow employee gets the promotion you wanted, if another player gets the starting position you tried out for, if another student gets the scholarship you hoped to receive, if someone has more money, talents, looks, and opportunities than you do, the human tendency is to feel you have less. The world can make you believe your potential is reduced by others’ successes—not only do you have less but you are less.             In a revelation given to Moses, Moses saw God’s glorious creations and realized how insignificant he was in comparison. Moses said: “Now for this cause I know that man is nothing.” Then the Lord taught him about human potential: “And the Lord God spake unto Mo